Earlier today I had to put my first-and-only, longtime dog to sleep after many years of camaraderie. It was one of the saddest moments of my life. Since the moment I had to leave him behind, I’ve been torn by two different feelings. One by guilt, wondering whether a couple more days might have changed anything, and one by longing, not for the sadness that comes in the immediate aftermath, but for the good memories I have. But right now, it’s difficult to focus not on the sadness, but the happy memories.