Haruhi Suzumiya, Endless Eight, part 5 – or how I broke the cycle

I’m seriously starting to lose count of the episodes. Mazui has this listed as the 16th episode, but wait there were 14 episodes in the first season alone? Are they referring to the chronological order of the show? Anyway, I thought I’d read that Mazui was dropping Haruhi (apparently I was mistaken), so I downloaded the YSHI subs which were listed as episode 16. Anyway, this is my story, it is based on completely true events…

Haruhi being cute… stop distracting me KyoAni!

I was half-watching another episode of Endless Eight. I was half-heartedly cheering for this arc to end. And somehow I got the feeling that Kyon would be hearing from Haruhi soon.

The phone rings.

And then Kyon’s sister says, "Kyon-kun, phone," in her saccharine voice.

And then Kyon responds saying "You don’t have to tell me that."

Haruhi starts talking. "Kyon-kun, you’re free today right? We’re all meeting in front of the station at 2. Be sure to come." And then hangs up.

Kyon hasn’t said a word. Seconds later, Haruhi calls back. "I forgot to tell you what to bring," she says, "Swimwear, plenty of money, and be sure to-"

"Come on my bike, right?" Kyon asks, finishing her sentence.

A surprised Haruhi quickly plays along, "Right! You’re catching on! If you’re late, food’s on you!"

And this is where I thought something is a little off here.

They all go to the swimming pool, and Koizumi notices a strange feeling, but shrugs it off, "With all that’s happened since the start of spring, I’m probably just worrying too much."

Something is very wrong, I thought.

Kyon notices that Nagato is harboring a bored look, and then gets a sudden serious feeling of deja vu. Haruhi brings two kids over to Kyon. "Kyon!" she says.

"Haruhi." Kyon responds.

Then Haruhi says, "these two are my subordinates. They’ll do anything you ask. So ask away."

"Have I suddenly become clairvoyant?" Kyon wonders.

Ding! Ding! Ding!

"Kyon, ball!" Haruhi tosses the ball, hitting Kyon in the face.

"Seems not," Kyon things to himself.

But I know better. I’ve seen this before. I’ve felt this strange feeling of deja vu. But unlike that punk-ass Kyon, I wasn’t going to let this feeling go. I was going to do something. Anything. How could I know whether this was the latest episode of Endless Eight? How could I be sure? What if it was just a troll sub? Would I know the difference? Hell, how did I know KyoAni wasn’t personally going out of their way to troll me? Were they watching me? Could they see me? Right. This. Moment?

I fastforwarded the video, looking for clues. Yukata? Frog suit? Music? O-bon festival scene? They’re familiar, but… no! no! no! how could I be sure? And then I remembered. The last iteration of Endless Eight was the 15,513th time. Omoshiroi! Omoshiroi! Omoshiroi! I fastforwarded to Nagato’s revelation. The moment of truth. What would she say? Would she confirm my suspicions? Or would I be destined to be unsure, stuck in a neverending loop?

"This is the 15,513th time," she replied listlessly.

Eureka! I’d found it! Confirmation! A way to break the cycle! And then I did the only logical thing I thought I could do. I closed the damn video window and walked away from Haruhi’s neverending nightmare.

Eight minutes, it took.

An endless eight minutes.

I’d lost them.

But I’d broken the cycle. I saw the daylight. I could finally move on. Endless Eight no more.

And then… Mazui released the real part 5 of Endless Eight, and suddenly I was stuck in the endless August loop again.

Oh, the irony.